A Public Service Announcement
by I'm Over There
Summary: Harley Quinn asks politely for OCs to leave her Puddin' alone. Complete.
1. Chapter 1

A Public Service Message, in Fanfiction guise.

* * *

"Please don't write OC parings for The Joker, becuase he has a cannon paring. ME. My name is Harley Quinn and and I'm very nice and Mista J is all mine. You can search my name and get a lot of info about me! Puddin' is more than just a Heath Ledger (rest in peace) movie character and desrves more than just an OC. 'Sides, in the end, no one really likes OC stories that much anyway." said Harley Quinn, jumping up and down, waving her arms in expression.

"I agree!" Everyone else in all the Batman Universes said, as Harley walked away.

* * *

Don't kill me for this, people!!


	2. The OC And not the TV show

I don't know why I wrote a chapter two, but I guess I wanted to try out this OC business everyone is raving about.

* * *

Sarina, who had such an uncommon name meaning "one who laughs" becuase when she was born, she laughed instead of cried, even when she turned and saw the anguish on her mother, who had just finished a 'natural' child birth (not all it had cracked up to be--get it, I said 'cracked up') and was writhing in pain beneath the bloody white hospital sheets, was seventeen on this very day and the only present she had asked for was permission from her parents to move to the most dangerous city on the planet, Gotham.

Packing all her things into the bright yellow convertible she had received last year on her sixteenth birthday, she said one last goodbye to her parents.

"Be careful." her mother pleaded, "I wouldn't want you to get hurt. Gotham is a very dangerous place."

"Whatever." Sarina groaned back, tired of her mother's overbearing-ness.

"And watch out for criminals like Scarecrow, Two Face, Mad Hatter, Poison Ivy....JOKER..." Her father reminded.

Sarina laughed, "Yeah right, like those even exist."

She climbed into her car and drove away from her waving, smiling parents.

Truthfully, she did believe in the costumed criminals her father had warned her about, in fact, that was the sole reason she decided to move to Gotham City. She wanted to see them for herself, especially the Joker...

* * *

Joker sat alone in a secret hideout of his wondering what to do about Batman this time. It couldn't be too much, or else the caped crusader would die, and the game would be over, but it had to be enough that people, including the Bat, still took him seriously (of course he used that term loosely).

He jumped up.

"A ha!"

He had just gotten an idea.

"I will jack the next car coming into Gotham! That person won't know who I am or what I can do! It will be SOOOOO funny!" and he fell to the ground laughing.

In a few hours he calmed himself enough to get out the door and walk out in broad daylight to the road that entered Gotham.

* * *

It was the dead of night when Sarina rolled into town, her yellow car was the only thing that stood out.

She wasn't paying attention, being stuck in traffic and all, so someone was able to sneak up behind and and get in the backseat of the convertible.

"Nice car you got here." Joker said.

Sarina still slept serenly.

"I said...NICE CAR YOU GOT HERE!" Joker repeated, this time loud enough to wake Sarina.

In one swift motion, Sarina twirled around and managed to grab Joker by the collar and throw him out of the car. She got out of the car, slamming the door behind her, preparing to finish the job.

"I don't know who you are, buddy, but you're gonna regret waking me up..." she said darkly.

Joker stood, he was impressed by her seemingly superhuman ability to pick up a grown man twice her size and throw him out of a car.

"Good evening." he said, tipping his hat and bowing slightly, "My name is The Joker."

Sarina stepped back, Joker wasn't the sort of person you'd wanna meet in a dark alley, she looked around, they weren't in a dark alley. She decided instead of screaming and running like any stupid person would do, she'd play and win his little game.

"Nice to meet you." She said, curtsying, "My name is Sarina Columbina."

"Wow!" Joker said, finally seeing how strikingly beautiful Sarina was, despite the darkness. She wore bright yellows, oranges and reds and looked amazing, "You know..." he said smoothly, "Hows about you and me take a little ride, I've got a proposition for you..."

* * *

Sarina couldn't believe it.

She was driving her car and Joker was in the car talking to her. She had read in a magazine once, that if you laugh at all his jokes, a man will love you. So that's just what she did. They were in love.

As Joker explained that he needed a henchwoman to help him with his schemes, he couldn't quite shake the feeling that he was forgetting about something...or someone.

When he and his new "girlfriend" arrived at his secret hideout, opened the door and entered, he smelled something. It was food cooking. Then he remembered.

Not again.

Not even hesistating for a moment, he pulled out his gun and shot Sarina dead.

Hearing the gunshot, Harley ran out of the kitchen and glared, rolling her eyes that looked at the dead body "Not another one..."

* * *

Yeah, well there are so many...

And all OOC and inconsistencies were placed purposefully.


	3. The Revenger OC

Why oh why did I write another? Just read it, please!

* * *

The moment it was all over the news that Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy were out committing crimes together, she had it all figured out.

Who was 'she', you might ask, but you wouldn't receive a straight answer.

To some she was a feared criminal, to others she was a feared criminal-catcher. She was always so mysterious and covered in shadow that no one truly knew who she was.

Not even herself, for 'she' had amnesia.

And the only thing she could remember was the night of her family's murder, which she survived with only a scar, and a cackling laugh that pierced the night (even though the murder was committed during the day).

But more about that in a random flashback later, okay? Right now 'she' was figuring everything out.

'She' used her detective-like skills of deduction to come to the conclusion that because Harley Quinn was teaming up with Poison Ivy, Quinn had broken up with The Joker.

It was time to make her move.

Despite the fact that when her family was murdered, they were living in California, 'she' knew the moment she heard that laugh on TV during a report about Gotham City's most notorious villain, that that was the man who killed her mother, father and infant baby brother, leaving her cowering under a bed with a bleeding cut on the corners of her mouth.

A permanent frown.

The cuts turned into scars, but the emotional wounds never healed and left her with the desire to commit the same crime her family's murderer had: murder.

'She' wanted revenge.

On The Joker.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

DRAMATIC BREAK

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was 12:00 (well, actually 11:57, but 12 sounds better) and the First Bank of Gotham was about to be broken into.

This bank was often a target of robbery by both big time and small time crooks, that's why it had absolutely no guards. I mean, who would want to work the nightshift at place you KNEW you were gonna get killed at by a criminal eventually.

Harley and Ivy walked right in the unlocked front door after taking out the dummy security cameras just in case.

"Let's get the money and go!" Ivy ordered, rushing towards the vault that was left open, "There still will be time to save the rainforest!"

"Teeheehee!" Harley giggled, "We're so bad! Mista J is gonna be so mad!"

The woman ran into the vault and suddenly the door was shut on them.

"Hey!" Harley cried, "What's the big idea!?"

"What's going on here?!" Ivy shouted.

They banged on the vault door, but were unable to pound it open with their bare fists.

Harley and Ivy were locked in.

On the outside of the vault, 'She' laughed.

"They fell right for my trap!" she laughed, "Criminals are so stupid! Now all I need to do is call Gotham PD and get out of here. That will keep Harley out of the way!"

Before 'She' could dial the phone, what looked like a giant bat swooped down from the ceiling and landed in front of her.

"Who are you!?" 'She' asked, even though he was obviously The Batman.

"You're in my turf." Batman stated, "Only I can catch criminals in Gotham. Who are you?"

"You haven't heard of me?" 'She asked, flipping her long black hair, "I'm…"

'She' searched her mind for a good codename that would be beautiful, yet dark. An accurate representation of her personality. Well she was out to get revenge so…

"I'm the Revenger!" 'She' declared.

Batman blinked.

Not only was the name 'The Revenger' horrible grammar, it was the worst fake name he had heard in his entire super-hero career.

"Who are you going to get revenge on?" He asked.

"That's my secret." Revenger said.

Suddenly, she remembered Joker and so the night of her family's murder…

**FLASHBACK**

_Her mother was signing a lullaby to her baby brother. _

_She was six years old and ducked under her bed when she heard the first shout. _

_A shot. _

_Another shout. _

_And body hit the floor. _

"_Daddy…" she whispered, tears stinging her eyes. _

_Her baby brother began to cry from his crib in the next room. _

_Feet trudged up the stairs. Bump. bump. bump. _

_The door to her _

"_Not Johnny!" _

_Her mother's voice._

"_Not my baby!" _

_Another shot. _

_The baby wasn't crying anymore. _

_What was happening? _

_Who would do this?_

_Why?_

_She crawled out from under her bed, she had to do something. _

_Laughter._

_Cruel, cold laughter. _

_She dropped to the ground and covered her ears. _

_Her head was pounding. _

_Why?_

_Why?_

_Why?_

_The final shot. _

_Aimed at her head somehow missed and somehow was able to cut both sides of her face. _

_She couldn't move but saw the blood. _

_Red oozing everywhere. _

_She ran. _

**END FLASHBACK**

"Hello? Hello?" The Batman was waving a hand in front of Revenger's face, "Are you alright?"

Revenger socked Batman in the face and ran out the door of the bank with renewed purpose.

Tonight Joker died.

Batman was left standing dumbstruck, watching the Revenger run away.

He decided with little reason that she was dangerous and he had to stop her. He ran out the door after her.

"Somebody HELP US!"

Harley and Ivy's cries for help were left unheard and they were forever trapped in the vault of First Bank of Gotham.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"It's time."

Joker backed up and hit the wall of the alley. A gun was inches from his skull.

"Now, now miss…"

"Revenger." Revenger growled.

"Miss Revenger, pleasure to meet you." Joker said diplomatically, holding out a hand for Revenger to shake, "And to what do I owe this gun in my face."

"You know exactly what you did." Revenger stated, "You killed my family twenty years ago!"

Joker looked at the night sky as if trying to remember, "Nope!" he finally said, "I don't recall ever killing your family."

Revenger ripped off her black and pink mask, revealing her scarred face.

"NOW DO YOU REMEMBER?!" She demanded.

"….still nothing." Joker shrugged, "You've got the wrong guy."

"But the laugh!" Revenger shrieked, "I know it was you!"

"Look lady, twenty years ago I was still dressing up like little red ridding hood and stealing chemicals from a factory." Joker said, "There is no way I killed your family, okay?!"

"Then who was it?!" Revenger asked angrily, "Who else laughs like a maniac except you!?"

"I dunno." Joker said, "Just because you have that ugly scar on your facing making you look very frowny, doesn't mean that everyone else in the world can't have a laugh!"

"I'm gonna have a laugh right now." Revenger announced, "When I kill you."

She readied the trigger to pull.

"Stop right there!"

The Batman jumped off the roof and kicked the gun out of Revenger's hand.

"You both are going to Arkham." Batman warned, "Right now!"

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Batman somehow captured and transported Revenger and Joker to Arkham where somehow they wound up in the same cell, even though they were opposite gender and it was against the rules.

They spent many months together in close quarters where they shared stories, sexual tension and Joker even was uncharacteristically kind enough to help Revenger when she started having nightmares about her family's murder.

During this time Revenger forgot all about her plot to kill Joker and instead fell in love with him.

And since Harley was out of the way, they quickly hooked up once all the proper confessions and consents were made. They had sex in the Arkham prison cell right after their first non-accidental kiss.

They had twelve accidental kisses before where Revenger tripped and landed on Joker, kissing him.

And finally they broke out together.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The First Bank of Gotham, being such a target for crime, had twenty guards posted on the outside alone.

Joker and Revenger killed them all.

But before they walked into the bank, Joker pulled Revenger aside.

"One more thing." He chuckeled, pulling out a knife.

Using the knife, Joker carved a smile on Revenger's face where the frown scars once lay.

"Now you're perfect!" He declared, kissing Revenger.

Despite the fact that she should have been rolling around on the ground in agony since she just got her face cut up, Revenger took Joker's hand and they walked together into the bank.

"There's the vault." Revenger pointed.

They crept over to the vault and opened it, somehow knowing the combination.

Out jumped Harley and Ivy. (even though they shouldn't have still been alive.)

"WOAH!" everyone exclaimed at once, surprised to see each other.

Joker looked at Harley in her adorable harlequin costume and then at Revenger in her boring, non-descript pink and black costume. He again removed the knife from his pocket and thrust it into Revenger's chest.

She fell dead, instantly on the ground.

Harley, Ivy and Joker all looked down at the body, bleeding out on the bank floor and shrugged.

Joker swept Harley off her feet, kissed her and carried her away bridal style.

"Who was that?" Harley asked.

"I haven't the foggiest." Joker answered.

* * *

And would it be too much to ask for a reveiw?


End file.
